Friday, December 27, 2013

Busy days on The Darkened Path.

Hello All and Blessed Be! I realize I have not updated for nearly a month and I fervently apologize! I have been mindlessly busy working on the second book, of which only three painstaking chapters are done. I have also been battling a raging sinus infection,  babysitting a small infant, working on other side jobs, and I recently adopted a black kitten. The life at home has been one thing after another. It's no wonder I find little time to write anything! I want this next book to be much better than the previous book, which to my disappointment was a flop, I have not yet sold a single copy and that got me down for a bit. However, very few of us experience smashing success on the first go so I have not given up! We newbies to the self publishing world have fierce competition and have to work hard to find a niche to establish ourselves. I have spent a lot of nights awake compiling my materials and adding more pages and enriching my next book so that it will hopefully be the one that gets me noticed. My issue lately seems to be that I think I have added enough to a chapter, then I find more things to squeeze in and honestly I have so much material to place that I am having trouble trying to spread it out into the book in the correct chapters and sections. I seriously had no idea I had so many spells, recipes, notes, and instructional material floating in my notebooks, and in my head, and every time I make a new spell recipe or cast a new spell, it gets written down somewhere and saved. 15 years worth of witchy workings and experiences is a load to begin with, with more added as I go. I already have a new idea for another book floating in my head and I have been writing notes for that. The plot centers on a secret, forbidden passion between two people from different religious backgrounds. Can a Christian and a Pagan bridge the gap of a centuries old underground war and find their place ? Can others that would destroy them realize that true love knows no boundaries? Can a secret, passion and a budding love find it's place and thrive in a world where the Light is forever trying to vanquish the Darkness?

Friday, November 29, 2013

Some snippets from Yours Truly.

I apologize for not updating in awhile, I have been steadily gathering materials and notes for my second book and trying to compile it together so I can write it out as I intend it to be. Trying to piece together this year of 2013, and rounding up all of my spells , recipes, and other bits and pieces of knowledge has become a task bigger than I had originally planned, and I am thinking I may have to present some of my spells and witchy workings into the third book when I get to that. Now that I think of that idea, that actually sounds like something more manageable.  If anyone wants a sneak peek into some of the spells and crafts that will be featured in book 2, please go to my other blog titled "Ravenwolf's Blog Of Witchy Workings". There are a smattering of spells that are older and some that are very recently done.  I am open to reader's suggestions as to what types of spells and workings you all would like to see written into my books, I shall do my best to accommodate and  give my readers what they ask of me. I am also open to any opinions or ideas or questioning that my readers can come up with that they would like to understand or find out about.  My talents at spell crafting and casting are extremely varied and come in a wide range of tastes and flavors from the Light and Bright, to the Dark and Dangerous. I have poked a wand into many different things and ideas over the last 16 years!

  My most emphasized section of the second book will most likely be on dream work, ghosts, entities, spirits, astral projection, empathy, and many other types of clairvoyant and psychic phenomena and practice, as I am a Receptive type person. Receptive being as in I can see, hear, feel, and pick up entities, spiritual presence, read vibrations of mood and thought patterns, and energies from people, places, objects, and the general atmosphere. I also have very strong and vivid dreams that range from preemptive to full out of body type projections. I have actually had people swear they have seen me in places I know full well I was not physically there during that time, as it was physically impossible for me to have been there during that time or for the fact I was unable to physically go there to begin with, and others have told me they had the same exact dream as me down to the last detail. Apparently my astro-projected self likes to go and visit people and shock the fear of the devil out of them, and go out and see places and do a bit of time and space travel. Sometimes it is not as strong as it should be and I am not a full expert adept, that takes years of practice and exercise to learn, practice, and comprehend. My most difficult divinatory lessons I have yet to fully learn is reading the Tarot and crystal and mirror gazing, I have a hard time memorizing the many meanings of the cards and crystal and mirror work occasionally gives me a headache and I have concluded that mirrors and crystals just maybe are not my mode of clairvoyant traveling.  I suppose my skill level would be considered intermediate.

 I have days where the "noise" in my head and around me is so intense and bombarding that I have to tune it out and shut it off or else I feel overloaded and frazzled. It becomes like a mass broadcast and jumbles together like someone is channel surfing through tv channels at a rapid pace. It makes my head hurt and I cannot think or feel anything but  a incessant buzzing that  is scattered with random bits and pieces of information and nothing is a coherent string of solid continuance.  I am often accused of being a reclusive hermit and extremely antisocial, hmm just maybe I don't always enjoy being privy to other's emotions and thoughts at times? Negative entities and energies, and people seem to be unusually attracted to me at times and I am heavy into protective and shielding work and occasionally my best efforts at warding off myself from the psychic and energy draining fiends do not always work and  then I find that I am under attack by a unseen force that s determined to wreak havoc with my defenses and my brain.. "Normal" people reading this post are probably questioning my sanity or scoffing at my claims and ideas, I'm sorry ..you cannot be "sane" and "normal" and survive and thrive in this world and face everything in it with tunnel vision and a closed and narrowed mind!  For now my readers I have to go. I think I have ramblend enough and gacve you all enough to ponder about while I am busy trying to string together a coupel more chapters to my newest work. *Blessed Be*

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Price change and other revisions.

  Things are not going well on The Darkened Path series. Thus far there have been literally no sales, a lot of free sample downloads, and what seems to be a lot of constructive critical advice from various sources I have asked for feedback.  It is  meant to enlighten me about how  many atrocious grammatical and editorial errors I have made. 2 out of 4 people are telling me just how bad I have screwed up and that I need to just pull down the entire project and scrap it or else do a complete overhaul and republish. Else I damage my writing reputation even worse? Um, I was not aware I have joined some kind of secret publishing mafia where the slightest grammatical error will get me killed on the spot?  Even so much as a typographical slip up will land me in author's purgatory for the rest of my life. Oh the shame and horror!!

    No, my readers, I am not in the best mood.. it's probably best described as darkly humorous and slightly depressed. I am famous for at least having a sense of dry and dark humor when I am in a bad mood. Sometimes my attempts at being humorous is not considered funny and I can be rather crude about it at times, depending the situation and the actual mood I am in.  I look at life in ways that most would not ever consider "normal" so meh.. Oh, and let me not forget to mention that I apparently need help on my blog posts and how well I set it up and lay it out and what have you.. Despite that,  I seem to see a decent amount of views on here and the other 3 Blogger pages regardless of my occasional butchering the English Language. I suppose I cannot be pleasing everyone and there will always be at least one person that has some exceptionally high standard of excellence, that is not satisfied or happy with anything less than stellar performance.      

     Some reviewers and  communities have given positive feedback and encouragement, which I much appreciate and give many thanks for. I wrote this entire first book, on a Microsoft Office 2010 program, with absolutely NO help from anyone. I do not have the financial resources to actually take up a project with a editor or anyone that can seriously help me properly execute my writing strategy and make it all look and sound absolutely perfect so that I can get it sold.  It took me a mind numbing 2 weeks to write 3/4 of the 242 pages. Perhaps I will be considered as over glorifying myself here..but that book is my entire 30 years of my life, every dark and horrid secret I have kept to myself for years, is written out in graphic and gritty details that most people would probably cringe at even thinking about, let alone actually enduring on a first person basis. Perhaps they need to just read the words on the pages and not be looking at every itty bitty flaw and pay actual attention to the story, and take the time to just maybe find out that it could be worth the few dollars they spent to download or purchase. If not there is such a thing as a return.

  Another idea that has been pointed out to me several times, is the price of my work. I suppose $6.99 is perhaps a bit much to ask, maybe I did not want to publish my work for nothing gained, or for free or that I wanted just to be seen and heard? I'll change the price one more time..maybe to 4.99 but that is the absolute lowest I am going to go, I don't believe in "Free" anything and hard work is supposed to pay. I am not a elephant that works for peanuts and praise, and that is insulting the elephant.  I really do not see that the current price of my work is so much to be asking. It's a very small $0.34 a page. if I am not mistaken, buying a small package of blank copy paper costs about that much if not more?  I am going to stop with the emotional seething for now..  I run the risk of damaging my independent author's poor soul so much that my reputation will be damned for eternity.

Thursday, November 7, 2013

The Darkened Path is up for Expanded Distribution!

I discovered something today that made me very happy! createspace.com, the Amazon site I used to publish my book TheDarkenedPath book:1  has finally allowed we publishers the expanded distribution option for free!  before it was $25.00 to add three extra distribution and sales channels, now I can get my work seen and possibly sold to a lot more potential customers! So if anyone who is a retailer, library, school, wholesaler or anyone else looking to add a new title to your collections then I am happy to announce that my work is finally available to you at a wholesale price here ---> https://www.createspace.com/4216755.  Again the Kindle version is also available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and several of their partner sites. I am slowly and painstakingly working on the second book, I have a lot more to write into it and there seems to be tons of my own spells, recipes, and other such ideas to transcribe onto a screen. I honestly had no idea I had written so much stuff down on paper and I was leafing through my journals and notepads and finding stuff I had done literally years ago! I have a daunting task ahead to get all of that written word for word onto a Word Document and so for I have managed to finish about 25 pages of what will probably be around 300 pages if not more.


    The Path is about to get a bit deeper and darker than it was before, we will be taking flashbacks from the past lessons of my younger life and what and how it shaped me into who I am now  and what I learned from it and how I applied it to myself and my Path, and what I have steadily and slowly learned and practiced for the last 15 years. We are forever learning something, knowledge in all it's forms cannot be learnt in a lifetime, and I will be walking this Darkened Path for many more moons and for many more lifetimes until I can find my way to the end.

Monday, October 21, 2013

The Darkened Path Book One: The Burden, Price Change.

I have dropped the price of the kindle edition to my book, The Darkened Path Book One: The Burden, to the lowered price of $6.99.  http://astore.amazon.com/pagansamongus-20/detail/B00FF4HZUE    The printed version's price has gone down to a neat and tidy sum of $9.49 http://astore.amazon.com/pagansamongus-20/detail/1483929728.  While you all are browsing, feel free to browse my many, many other selections available for purchase and if there might be something missing please let me know so I may add it! Also, Beyond The Veil Spiritual Shoppe has expanded its selections of products to include Jewelry, Candles, Herbs, Oils, Spirit and Ouija boards, Pendulums, Ghost Hunting Accessories, and a few odds and ends of Home Décor!  http://astore.amazon.com/spiritsamongus-20.  There are three very wonderful necklaces of Santa Muerte, or Holy Death, available in both Sterling Silver and 14k Gold, as well as various charms and amulets, bracelets and other wearable pieces for your spiritual protection needs in a wide range of choices for those whom are of different Practices and Faiths . Samhain is approaching in 10 days, while many of us will be out trolling for candy and goodies, just as many of us, like myself, will be honoring the Pagan New Year with a huge altar set up with homemade goodies and crafts and all of my divination tools laid out for the chance at meeting with some wandering or searching spirits that might decide to  come and from beyond  the Veil and have a chat with me.  Samhain, or Halloween, is the night when the departed and maybe no so "dead" roam the entire world freely without bonds or bindings, the Veil between this world and theirs is nonexistent and occasionally a few not so nice entities and supernatural forces, and the truly undead, such as vampires, werewolves, zombies, and other types of  creatures, yes, I'm aware how laughable the idea sounds but whomever said they do not exist have you ever actually encountered one and lived to tell of it, or without possibly not so welcomed consequences if you did manage to survive??? Or perhaps you , my friend, are indeed one of the said types of beings and hiding it very well hmm?? On this one night of the year, and up until November 2nd for the Latin American cultures, the Dead are contacted, honored, welcomed, remembered, revered, and feared. Me?  So long as I am not possessed by something evil and violent, or my veins and psychic energy tapped like a  wine keg, or converted into a fur bearing howling she wolf , I'm not too overly concerned.. they can come and go as they will with my blessings and good tidings.

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Path is getting kinda dark and depressing.....

Well, my new book has thus far made no sales and I'm pretty down over that.  Potential customers and retailers are looking and checking things out but no sales thus far. I need at least $100.00 in royalty sales in order to launch distribution and offer sales to other countries and companies. I was somewhat hoping for a foot in the door of the publishing world and a chance to prove my worth a bit. Other things in my life are looking very dark and depressing indeed. My utilities are this close to being shut off, my heat bill is still unpaid,  and if this happens I will get evicted from the apartment I am already scraping the pennies to hold onto. It has not been a great two months. I can't afford to move otherwise I would. I had a grand idea and a vision of being successful as a author and publisher, somehow that is not panning out like I hoped. I'm still typing out the other book I'm planning to publish later on. I cannot let one failure keep me from a dream and a vision that I feel will eventually work out for me. I am reaching out and asking for help and support from the online community to help make my dream a reality. Everyone has already seen the links published in prior blog posts about where to find my work. to all my readers, Blessed Be and have a wonderful day.

Friday, October 4, 2013

The Darkeend Path is finally in print!!

I have happy news. My book is finally available in print on Amazon .com! The waiting was making me insane! I am trying very had to get Barnes and Noble to work with me to get it on their site too but they have stricter distribution guidelines.  Book can be found on this link--->="http://rcm-na.amazon-adsystem.com/e/cm?lt1=_blank&bc1=000000&IS2=1&bg1=FFFFFF&fc1=000000&lc1=0000FF&t=pagansamongus-20&o=1&p=8&l=as4&m=amazon&f=ifr&ref=ss_til&asins=1483929728"  I really hate how I have to post links and such on a page to get it to be seen right!! I am probably never going to learn how to do it right but I guess so long as it does what I want then I suppose that is ok? This book is important to me on a lot of personal levels and I believe it is of vital importance that  my readers read and understand it, as it gives a graphic and moving glimpse into the life of yours truly. I encourage everyone to give it a go and turn the pages and see what's really there. This book is my life thus far, written in black and white and it contains scenes and details I have never once in my life came out to anyone with and some of these pages were extremely emotionally difficult to type out on a page, let alone let the entire world see and know about it. It takes guts to take a lid off a shit pot of lies, secrets, and a past that has been "swept under the rug" and purposely hidden away by others for 30 years. I am very sure that if any of my family ever gets ahold of the actual manuscript and actually sees any of it, then I am going to be painted as a black balling ,lying, using, manipulating bitch or whatever they want to throw at me..that is perfectly fine really as the only reason it might piss anyone off is because they don't want the truths and blackened skeletons known about but it is also my life and I am perfectly free to write about and publish as I see fit. I mentioned no direct names except for a few, so it isn't like they are going to be able to say it is really about them anyway. I am not violating anyone's rights to privacy as I mentioned no one's actual names except those whom I had permission to use and I made sure to ask first before I even typed a word about them or their relationship to me. I am going to go now..somehow I am not having the greatest day despite my recent accomplishments, it just feels like one of those days where I cannot find a sense of serenity or contentedness. I feel as if a change is going to come into my life and I am possibly not going to be too pleased about it although I don't yet know what that might be I am sure to find out soon enough. To all my readers, Bright Blessings and Happy Reading!   

Monday, September 30, 2013

Book to be published to Barnes and Noble Nook

Updated status to my book, again... the book I have written for the series labeled " The Darkened Path" will soon be available to the Barnes and Noble Nook sales page hopefully within the next few days., for those users that perhaps don't use Amazon or don't have a kindle or other compatible device of which to download the files to from Amazon.  I am still waiting on my first printed copy, which is supposed to be here October 7th. I never thought that having to wait for something would be so agonizingly long!!!! Patience is sometimes not my forte especially when I am waiting on something important to happen. I shall hope that my thinning patience will pay off with something good very soon.

  So onto other matters. I am still seeing that tidal wave of change coming on the New Moon, as was mentioned in yesterday's post on http://pagansamongus.blogspot.com/  titled "The Angry New Moon".  At the moment, it seems to swell and recede, swell and recede again, and eventually its going to just swell to ginormous  proportions and  sweep everything and everyone into its maw of watery destruction and leave behind  possibly permanent changes in its wake.  I feel as if, after this New Moon comes and goes by, there will be some strong changes in my life  and for those that are involved in this maelstrom of emotional warfare.  right now I am making a black handmade candle, of which my intent for it is to protect myself and my home and family, and others  thatI consider a part of my life, whist simultaneously banishing and destroying negative energies, people and potentially harmful situations from my life and those whose lives I need to protect. the tidal wave can come if it wants, but im going to be waiting and prepared as best as I can be. I bid you all Blessings and Goodnight.

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

The Darkened Path (Kindle Edition)

So I said when I had the link for my book I would post it! http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00FF4HZUE   

I'm so happy, and working on getting it actually in print with createspace.com. to my annoyance, the fee to have my book distributed to other sites is $25.00. kinda have to wait to do that but I will be getting it done soon as possible! I will be back soon I promise, I'm busy posting that link everywhere it can be seen that I can manage to do for free at the moment. Bright Blessings to all!

The Darkened Path book 1

It's 4:30 am and I am very EXCITED and HAPPY to announce that my book is DONE!!!!!
It is scheduled to be put on the Amazon KDP store site sometime between the next 12 hours for the US and 48 hours for the rest of the world.  Although I am a bit put off by the fact the list price is only going to be $9.99, as that was the highest amount I could post it for, the fact that most of what I will be earning is still 70% in royalties from every sale is enough to keep my hopes up that surely someone across the world will purchase my work. I worked so hard on that 231 pages and I am begging  Higher Powers to please, please favor me on this! The second that I see that I can post a link to the book and where it can be found I will do so and I'm going be watching that earnings page like a hawk waiting for that first sale! I'm going to try and get it into print as soon as possible if I can manage it. So a note to all Amazon users and those that own a Kindle or digital device, be looking for "The Darkened Path, Book:1, The Burden" under the author name of S.M. Tillson, to come up soon on the site's newest listings. I have never had anything to be published for sale before and let alone have it be viewable across the entire world and that makes me feel like that I accomplished something special! My inspiration was J K Rowling, as when she published her first edition of the Harry Potter book series she was in a similar financial and social status as myself. while I know I will possibly not achieve the same status as her with my work, she is my inspiration, she went out on a limb and look where she is now! I bid you all Bright Blessings, I really need a cup of coffee and later, a nap. I've been burning the midnight oil for weeks now trying to hurry up and finish my book, and I have to start again soon on the second and maybe third installment to the series. I bid you all Bright Blessings and I will be back very soon!

Monday, September 16, 2013

New Book Update

I have not abandoned "The Journey of The Black Wolf " instead I have been rather busy with a different series titled   " The Darkened Path, Book 1: The Burden" this first book of the series is a partial biographical work of myself, and the first 30 years of my life from the time I was 7 & on up until present day, and is intended to be part of a series where I delve into my own personal demons, and realize I have a few magickally inclined gifts, that just maybe I am not as crazy and unbalanced as my family and peers would like to believe. and finally, finally, come into my own as a Solitary Witch and Divination practicioner, after having gone through several lifetime's worth of personal tragedies and setbacks. At the bottom of this page, is the cover of my new, about to be published work, I have thus far written about 120 pages and there is at least 50 more or so to complete before I get it published to Amazon Kindle.

To give everyone a sneak peek, here is a copy of the first two pages of the book, it has never been revealed to anyone, and I hope that you all will find this snippet to be a worthy read. There is much more to come, this is my Darkened Path. To all my readers, Blessed Be!        
 
 
""Book 1: The Burden

 Yes you read that right. “burden” was what I basically was to my family from the time I understood what the word meant and how it was applied to me and the situations surrounding me and my life. These chapters and some parts of the next few books are not going to be nice or sweet. They are gritty, depressing, occasionally heartbreaking and cruel. We will begin the magical part of this story at the time I was about seven years old. This time frame is my first vivid recollection of the idea that things were not normal or right in my life and in that of my fractured, socially unstable family. Some of you that read this book will probably be moved into some very angry and upset moods. For that , I apologize for your emotional upset, however.. the truth is the truth, and there is no avoiding or glossing over the facts.I was younger than seven when my mother, my dad and myself moved into this very old, debilitated, house on clear Creek Road in Newport , Tennessee. I think I was around four or five but when you are that young memories and impressions don’t stick in your mind unless it is a strong event. Before we moved to the house on Clear Creek, we had lived in a huge house in Dandridge, Tennessee. I do not remember much about living in that house and probably just as well I don’t because  Im pretty sure those memories are something I really don’t want to go back and examine in minute detail.  To this day I still struggle with some of those memories, as I’m sure you all will understand why as you keep reading.

I was born, Serita Milena Sprouse, on January 18, 1983, to Jacky D. Sprouse and Rita Faye Suggs. I was a extreme premature birth at 24 weeks gestation, my mother’s placenta ruptured and she was basically having a spontaneous abortion. Back at this time doctors gave very slim chances of survival to babies born like this and I was a extremely lucky case, I was born via C-section weighing a frail 1 pound and 10 ounces and immediately taken to the University of Tennessee where specialists were very shocked and surprised I was even alive, let alone breathing entirely on my own and staring at them all and flailing my pencil thin limbs in a tenacious stubborn fit, my mouth moving in a near soundless cry of what was probably outrage at having my world turned upside down. It was discovered I had no kind of severe birth defects or abnormalities usually found in extreme preemie births and that was even more a shock. My name and story was published in The Newport Plain Talk newspaper on the front page and again updated in April 1983 when I was allowed to go home from the hospital. Even from birth, I struggled and fought my way for survival and acceptance into this world where it was obvious I was so different from everyone and everything else around me and it has been this way for 30 years now. 

Let’s jump ahead, fast forward 5 years. I’m 5 years old and we are moving from Dandridge to Newport, To the house on Clear Creek. At this time there is strife and upheaval in my home, my mother is now a single parent, my dad having left us, where he actually went I honestly do not know.. but I do remember the violent arguments and physical abusive fighting he and my mother done in their drunken rages. Once she beat the headlights out of his Jeep truck and he dumped a pan of motor oil on her head, I remember her sitting in the tub trying to wash it off, there was her handprint of oil on the wall for a long time, another time they got into a fist fight and she had a leg off a table trying to beat him off of her and screaming at him. He beat her face repeatedly onto a woodstove and her face was a mess and she hid from everyone for weeks, after that incident he moved out permanently. They were both alcoholics, and my dad’s departure from our lives only worsened my mother’s downward spiral into binge drinking delirium. Weeks would go by where she did nothing but try to drown her sorrow, depression, bitterness and anger in a bottle, not caring what happened around her, not seeing or understanding what she was doing to herself and what little was left of both our lives. She wasn’t like this all the time, but when she picked up her alcohol, she was just in a haze where nothing and no one mattered and the sun wouldn’t rise tomorrow and to her it would have been fine.

 
 
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Sunday, June 30, 2013

Work! work! work!

  Has been all I have done for a straight month! so much so, that I have barely 20 pages of one of my books done! I'm so frustrated with myself! I think I have a minute to sit and type out a page or two but betime I get home my home life overwhelms me to the point where I get nothing done for myself until the late hours. My new job at the food processing factory is making me into a slave!

    Anyways.. above is  a photo of my book cover, the one titled "The Black Wolf's Book of Spells and Crafts"  I think it looks very nice indeed! This is the book I am currently working on in my account at createspace.com.  Much to my vexation..Myspace has decided to completely destroy its members' old pages and the new Myspace has nothing on it but music, pictures and entertainment media and everything else such as blogs, emails and other types of written pages have been cut out. I personally lost 3 years worth of blogs and notes and other things I was going to incorporate into my book and now I have to go back and rewrite everything and find all the old copies of everything that I originally had typed .  I blasted myspace with a angry complaint as they have no right to just destroy their members pages like that even if they do own the site and can modify and change whatever they want. I'm just glad I had the foresight to write down nearly everything  before I typed it out so I can at least redo it, which is going to take forever now. I've been having doubts and insecurities about how and when I'm ever going to finish this book series because it has become a lot bigger than I originally intended, I have a lot more material than I realized  and I'm wondering if I have bitten off more than I can chew!   for now , my readers, I have to leave you and go pack up stuff for work tomorrow and finish my housework.. a woman's work is never ever done and mine is
 

Monday, May 20, 2013

slaving away on my books! Working on a new title!

   Hello to my readers and Blessed Be to you all! So far I have chapter one done and part of chapter two. The first chapter consists of cleansing spells and tips, and spells and information for creating charged water and my own personal recipe for Holy oil. Chapter two will be about Banishment and Reversal of people, energies, and issues from your life, home, and sacred space.  I am slowly but steadily working on the companion book to Journey Of The black Wolf, which will be titled "The Black Wolf"s Book of Spells and Charms". I have more material to work with and add into that book and it will not take so long to write and you all will have a glimpse into my Crafts and Practices as a Solitary Pagan. I have a mixed bag of magical practices that include, Voodoo, Hoodoo, Santeria, Southern Root Work, Folk Magic, and many other southern and ethnic flavored ideas and theories. I also practice various divinatory methods such as Tarot, Pendulum work, Crystal and Mirror scrying,  Dreams, Astral Travel and other types of Divination as that was what  originally started me onto the Pagan Path to begin with. I am a natural Clairvoyant and Empath, that is my strongest talent aside from working on spells and things that require me to have my hands and brain busy. I'm one of those that actually has to see a visual or physical manifestation my work being done and a finished product or material. It makes me feel as if I actually accomplished  a goal and something about tangible realistic results satisfies my need for some kind of proof that I done something to make my desires or wishes manifest. Which is why you all will see massive ingredient lists to my formulas and lengthy complicated looking steps instructions to a spell or working that I am trying to convey to the reader. I have no problem of making a recipe for a powder with 25 separate ingredients and working a spell that takes half the night to finish. It makes me happy!!! 
  
   I'm also known to step a toe over to the "dark" side once in awhile because there are just some days where being all Light and Love just isn't going to cut it. Some people divide Magick into "Light" and Dark", and follow one path or another specifically. However there cannot be just Light and no Darkness and no Darkness without the Light and both must exist as a duality. I have had experiences where a darker imaged spirit will work with me or come to me instead of a light bearing one and I accept what comes and what he/she/they are offering in the way of help or advice and trying to reveal me in response to the work I am doing or the favor I am asking. there is a word out there in the "Dark" circles that describes me and the term is "Good-Dark", which to me actually makes perfect sense as at the time of my birth it was during the last quarter moon and several times I have had dark themed spirits and entities make contact with me during a working instead of the "light" themed spirits or entity I was originally asking for the favor.

One of my particular favorites is Saint Holy Death, and another is the Morrigan.  Yes those are from two entirely unrelated spectrums as far as culture is concerned but they both have appeared to me and Holy Death I have a personal thing with, as when I was born I was  not expected to survive because of very poor birth prematurity. Mom was 24 weeks and I was technically supposed to have been a stillbirth, spontaneous abortion. Back in the 80's most babies born like that had very slim odds. Instead of Death taking away another child (I was the third "lost" pregnancy), she stepped back and made a decision on my behalf and decided to take the other 5 children born in the NICU that were actually healthier and stronger than me. I was the only one that survived, the frailest and weakest as far as health and mortality was concerned, to me that was a high sacrifice to the other families to have to endure just for my sake. One tiny barely alive baby gets to live but 5 other healthier stronger infants suddenly all die from a heart condition or failure to thrive? But if Death herself grants you the favor to live when she could have just as well taken you.. well you better be appreciating her like the Saint that she is!!  The Morrigan is a Irish Goddess of  wars, death, and sovereignity and a triple goddess. Her form is the crow/raven and the wolf. This speaks to my predominantly Irish ancestry and that I seem have two guardian animals , the wolf (dog) and the crow (raven). there is a crow that lives in the wooded lot behind my apartment that likes to fly around where I happen to be and make alot of racket when I am outside, its always the same one and I swear it waits for me to come outside everyday. I have always attracted dogs and cats to me from nowhere.  both act are the same way, ive never seen a cat  or dog that didn't not come to me when called or suddenly find me to ask for attention or food. Currently visiting here is a solid white male stray that makes his rounds here once a week, and good luck usually follows him in some way or form. First time I saw him on my porch was the day I had my lease renewed after a eviction problem and voila..lease was renewed without a hitch. That cat now gets tuna and milk every time he is here!

   But enough about my oddball rambling, I shouldn't bore my readers with me oddities and weirdness LOL!  now for some serious stuff. Starting next week about Tuesday I will be starting a new job along with trying to write this book and manage my online stores and other things I try to work on. I finally got the 40hr a week job I've been asking for for weeks now. so updates and my weird musings will possibly dwindle down to the weekend hours when I am not utterly exhausted. I will be working on my book every hour that I get to write a page or a chapter. Until then..MerryPart to all and have a great week!   

Sunday, April 28, 2013

Book delayed yet again!...

It is to my disappointment and frustration to inform my readers that the book I am working on is yet again delayed. Another week has gone by with no computer. I ended up having to restore everything on this piece of garbage back to its original factory settings just to get my windows program and everything else to run! I am very frustrated and annoyed with this setback because I lost EVERYTHING I was working on and now I have to go back and re write every single word. I seriously wanted to rant, rage and cry, weeks worth of material , notes, drafts, and other things I had saved were totally wiped clean. what caused this disaster? I got a newer computer from somene that wanted rid of their desktop because supposedly it had a problem and they just wanted a new one.  I quickly discovered that oh it had a virus or malware somewhere and Windows 7 would not even start or load or anything,  and it was about to crash.  Note to self..never again have a Acer brand computer and do not take one that is "not working right" in hopes you can fix or refurbish it. I managed to get it fixed and now it is working fine..but at a serious cost to my work in the process. I am now behind a month, but the bright side is that I still have all my original work because I had the forseight to actually write it on paper before I started typing. I just have to go through the tedious and time comsuming process of gathering it all together and retyping it into Word documents. I shall perservere and I shall complete and finish my book come Hell or high water! A tiny thing like a malfunctioning computer is not going to get me down and I shall just direct my frustratiuon into  re writing all the pages I have had deleted. To all my readers, Thank you for your patience and Blessed Be!

Saturday, April 13, 2013

Work is slow on book.

I have to ask my readers to please forgive my lack of  publishing info on my new books, I have recently had to replace my eyeglasses prescription and I am waiting on it to arrive in the mail. Hopefully this coming Monday  I will be back to writing pages again. I am very frustrated and annoyed that I am so behind! Normally I would have had half a book written by now as I can usually sit here all day and type away and churn out pages at a time. At present moment I am working on advertising and promoting other things i have been working on trying to ease my frustration and just maybe make a dollar or two. To all my readers Blessed Be and Have a Nice Day!

Saturday, March 23, 2013

Hello to my readers and Blessed Be! I have now set up a amazon account and will be publishing a book about my personal experiences in my path as a eclectic Pagan. The book in itself is a partial biographical work, featuring excerpts from my own life and from the lives of people and situations surrounding me that have so far shaped and influenced me on my Path to Enlightenment, The entire book will consist of every type of paranormal, supernatural, spiritual, and magical happening that has ever happened in my life, and details of my journey, and everything i have so far learned and experinced as a solitary Pagan in my 30 years in this lifetime. There will be a series companion of this book consisting of my own personal spells, recipes for all of my personal oils, powders,and spell crafts, herbal mixtures, titled "The Black Wolf's Book of Spells and Crafts", I have not decided yet whether or not the companion book will be a ongoing venture or whether or not i will keep adding to it as a updated series. I will see how the initial response is from readers before I continue.
   
Also, there shall be a character created entirely to himself by the name of "Tristian the Black". "Tristian" is the name of my familiar spiritual guide and his form is a black wolf. I decided to give him a name and a complete personality and his own spiritual and emotional character in this book, to further detail and emphasize the role of spiritual guides, totem animals, and familiars associated with the Pagan path and the importance of having them integrated within the Pagan societies and what we Pagans learn and experience through interaction and correspondence with them. 

   In some chapters of the upcoming book, you all will see "Tristian's" point of view, his ideas, thoughts, feelings,and perceptions of the new world he experiences through the eyes, mind, and body, of his human female companion. He is bound to guide and protect on her journey throughout her natural life in this world until she dies.."Tristian's" new task, given to him by The God and Goddess,until Serita physically dies,and he is given back his wolf body in the next life, is to now bond with,  protect, teach, and guide the human girl. His soul and spiritual essence was planted into her as she was conceived, and after she was born, his spirit is reincarnated fully after the child's birth in order to help her survive the traumatic pregnancy,he is fully reborn again as a human child, as penance for killing a human in his former wolf body when he was a living animal in his previous life. He now gets to see and understand the human world and learn how humans act, feel, and live, and why and how they do things that he would not have understood in his wolf mind. Since he is now reincarnated into a female human body, and she bieng a witch at that, he is also on his own journey to enlightenment. He must learn to meld, blend, shift, and adapt to bieng "human" and learn and understand certain powers and gifts that The God and Goddess gift unto us humans,that he did not have as a wolf, while still bieng be true to himself. The human must bond with a wild wolf, and the wolf must become the human and they both must manage to coexist in order to learn and survive in a world where both Pagan and Wolf are feared,, hated, loved and respected.   
 
    What suprises ,shocks  and wonders will we both have in store for us throughout this life? Both human and animal must learn to coexist and meld together in harmony and unity inside themselves in order to survive, grow, and learn. How will we confront our daily challenges and tribulations and trials of living in a modern day world where to be "different " and "abnormal" is not accepted or tolerated? Can Tristain learn to accept, conform, and mold into his human embodimenet long enough to make it back home to his pack in The Next Life? After all..it's not everyday you wake up and realize youre actually inside a human body and youre essentially bound into it until your Higher Power dictates otherwise! 

     As of this writing, chapter 1 is finished, I will update more as I write each chapter to keep everyone informed of my progress. There will be at least 35 (or more?) chapters, with one chapter detailing every year of my life as i remember it from birth up until now, and additional chapters in ""Tristian's" personal views